Fit By Forty x Seven

It's been one week since I began my "Fit By Forty" quest to lose the weight I've put on in order to fit into my khakis by Thanksgiving/my 40th birthday.  Several factors have been in play over this time period.

Thanks to my friend Joline, talented author of the CuppaJo blog and completer of a half-marathon, I am for the first time ever working out with a buddy.  Um.  Well.  Sort of.  Joline lives 9 hours away from me in Pennsylvania.  That's 550 miles according to Mapquest.  She contacted me after my last post and we became accountability partners, encouraging each other in our workouts via email.  I've always been a loner in this area, but I must say it is working GREAT for me!  You'll have to check out Joline's blog to see how it's working for her.   http://thecuppajo.blogspot.com/2009/11/buddy-system.html

Another factor is I've been cooking for 3 hungry farmers this week.  When I take them lunch I also take Nathan with me and feed him while the guys eat.  I can't feed him and myself at the same time so I usually eat before I go.  Lately it's been something meal-replacement-bar-ish.  Makes it much easier to plan Weight Watcher points that way and I'm too busy right now to think much about sneaking food later.  Protein water and coffee are helping to curb my appetite, so for this week at least I'm able to really watch what I eat. 



Haven't tried on the khakis but the scale is showing me some encouraging numbers.  The true test, other than the khakis, will be what the scale at the doctor's office says.  My annual physical exam is scheduled later this week.  Believe me, I'm not excited, but it must be done.  We'll see how much The Dreaded Doctor's Office Scale affects my mood and thus my commitment to my program.


Good thing Joline's got Jillian Michaels kicking her butt these days.  Actually, I think Jillian is shredding her butt...either way, I'm sure she'll pass that butt-kicking along to me and project me right out of my slump.  Hurray for buddies!

Fit By Forty

It took a while, but it has happened.

In general I am pretty good about watching what I eat.  Lately though I've been watching what I eat go in my mouth, down to my lower half and expanding.  Two weeks ago when I was running late for church I went to put on my favorite khakis and I could not get them on.  

I was HACKED.  At myself.  I knew I'd been really careless and have noticed my pants getting tighter, but this was the first time this fall I'd tried to wear these particular pants.  Apparently I hit the breaking point.  

For those of you who know me, just stop with the "Wah wah wah you're so little you don't have anything to worry about blah blah blah."  Here is the thing:  It doesn't matter what size you are.  If you gain enough weight that you don't fit your clothes,  you have a problem.  And while I do have some yoga pants, I do not want to have to wear them all the time.


I rather like my wardrobe.  It has taken me several years and a substantial investment to build it to this point.  I FLAT OUT REFUSE to let myself go to the point that I have to start over from scratch.  I busted my tail (literally) to get back into my clothes after Nathan was born.  Gaining a few pounds is one thing.  Not fitting your clothes is quite another.


As an added bonus, I will turn the big 4-0 on November 25, the day before Thanksgiving.  

I refuse to feel "fat and forty."  I refuse to have my clothing options limited by my own poor choices and lack of will power.  I refuse to buy another wardrobe.  I refuse to loathe seeing myself in a mirror.  I refuse to be unhealthy.  I refuse to allow the Enemy to have any little niche to poke his nose in and cause me trouble.  I refuse.  I refuse.  I REFUSE!!!


I have just under three weeks to get my rear in gear to meet my goal and fit into my khakis.  This is an attainable goal.  I am working my plan.


And as I know that at the age of forty it gets REALLY hard to keep weight off, I intend to continue to make changes in my lifestyle.  For a while now I have been slowly making small improvements in our eating habits and will continue to do so.  

The biggest obstacle is making exercise a priority.  But, even fifteen minutes a day can help.  As Flylady says, "You can do anything for fifteen minutes."  The near-miraculous transformation of my previously cluttered basement is proof of that.


I intend to have a little less "junk in my trunk" in three weeks.  I intend to wear my khakis to Thanksgiving dinner.



Oh, and uh, I intend to ask you to please pray for me.

The Murky World of My Thought Process

Yesterday I completed the household chore I like the least -- vacuuming, sweeping and mopping the floors.  I would rather do just about anything else, including go to the dentist, than clean floors.  

I got to wondering as I cleaned...I have heard that there are trees and grass in Heaven.  I love trees and grass.  But as trees and grass grow in dirt, does that mean there is also dirt in Heaven?  When I go inside my "mansion in glory" am I going to take dirt in with me?  Am I going to have to clean floors in Heaven?  FOR ETERNITY?  

I mean,  I think we will have jobs in Heaven, but it will be something we LIKE to do, right?  I'll get to socialize and make everyone laugh, right?  There will be other tasks God would have me do that I'm perfect for, right?  I won't have to spend eternity cleaning floors...right?  Right?  Someone please tell me I'm right...

Okay.  Wig-out time is over.  I'm okay.  If God wants me to clean floors,  I guess I'll enjoy it, right?  

Right?  :)

 

2 things

This will be quick, as I only have a moment before laundry/Nathan/farming/lunch chaos begins:

I have wondered for a looooonnnnngggg time about the words at the end of some of the blogs I follow.  They are like little guidance words for your posts, like if I write about kayaking, at the bottom it would say "kayaking" and then anyone could click on that to find what else I've written about kayaking.

Finally figured it out (it's good to ASK for help) and updated my past blogs with this Labels feature.  I know.  Sometimes I amaze even myself with my sheer lack of tech savvy.  It may slow me down, but it's not stopping me!

Secondly, and completely unrelated in any way, I am now okay with giving away my maternity clothes and Nathan's baby clothes.  What is it about telling others of your concerns and troubles that frees you from them?  I am learning more and more about the power of the spoken word every day.  Hope to post more on that at a later date...

Be blessed today!  :)

Holding On

Flylady.net has been, and continues to be, a huge help to me.  This wonderful lady and her team are revolutionizing my life by helping me declutter and organize.  My basement looks better than it has since we moved into this house 9 years ago, and my cabinets and closets, papers and piles, are slowly but surely coming into line.  Babysteps rule!

I have pitched and/or given away literally dozens of large trash bags full of stuff.  If I don't use it, need it or love it, it's gone.  Outta here.  Later, gator.  Several local organizations are benefiting from this process, and I am overjoyed to bless others with these items. 


However, there are a few things I am struggling with getting rid of.   I'm having a real hard time parting with my maternity clothes.  And Nathan's baby clothes.  I know for certain that neither of us will use them again, but I can't bring myself to let them go. I've happily loaned them out to others, but there's just something about the permanence of giving them away that so far has made me hesitate.


I do know that I will get there, that one day (hopefully) soon I WILL HAVE HAD IT and I will quickly grab them and take them to our local crisis pregnancy center...just not yet. 

I'm saddened that this seems so difficult for me.  I understand about emotional attachement and what not and I know I will be okay with it eventually, but it makes me wonder...


What other things in my life do not work for me, do I no longer need, and do I not love, that I still stubbornly refuse to throw away?  What habits, attitudes, agreements am I harboring like fugitives in the basement of my spirit?  


Who'd a thunk that decluttering the basement would have such an impact on the clutter in my soul?

The What of the Lord is my What?

     They looked at me like I had lost my mind.  But then, they usually look at me like I've lost my mind. 

     I'd been wrestling around with it for a week or so.  I hadn't had any real time I could sit down and contemplate, so I asked my friends one night for their answers:  "Okay," I said. "' The joy of the Lord is my strength.'  Why?"  Pause.  Pause.  Deer-in-the-headlights.  I explained further.


     What I don't really get is the Joy part.  Why not The Hope of the Lord is my Strength?  Or The Love of the Lord?  Or The Peace?  Or The Strength?  Why The Joy?  
     And why is the Joy of the Lord Strength?  What is so strong about joy?


     AND, is that even IN the Bible, or is it just a nice phrase like "This too shall pass?"  

     While I found their answers to be very insightful, I still wasn't completely satisfied.  

     I found the verse way back in the eighth chapter of Nehemiah.  The Exiles had returned to Israel, rebuilt the wall around Jerusalem and settled into towns.  Everyone who could understand, men and women, came to listen to Ezra the priest read aloud the Law of Moses.  The people stood up for the entire 5-6 hours it took him to read.  Ezra praised the Lord, the people worshiped and the Levites explained what he was reading.  The people wept as they listened.  

     Nehemiah said, "Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared.  This day is sacred to our Lord.  Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength." (v10)  Then all the people went away to eat and drink, to send portions of food and to celebrate with great joy, because they now understood the words that had been made known to them. (v12)


     So the Israelites celebrated with joy because they now knew and understood who they were and what they needed to do to walk with God.  They were joyful in their newly found knowledge and their restored relationship.

     But is that The Joy of the Lord?


     God IS His Word.  As the people listened to the Word, understood the Word, and responded to the Word, they were responding to God Himself.  Turning their hearts to Him.  Finally, after 70 years in exile, they were broken and repentant.  Nothing brings God more joy than when we come back to him in repentance.  God was joyful that His relationship with His people had been restored.  He could again fulfill the promises He had made to the Patriarchs and make them into a great nation that would bless the world.  His will could finally be done.


     But what about the strength part?  After standing up from daybreak until noon, with their brains on overload and their hearts heavy, the Israelites were surely exhausted at the very least. Then they were told to go feast and quit crying.  Celebrate!  Grab a bite!  Sit down and relax!   As they did, you can imagine what that must have done for their bodies, minds and spirits.  
      So, for me anyway, I'm thinking that The Lord's Joy is me internalizing His word and repenting of my sin, thus restoring my relationship with Him.  It is my Strength because He, in His mercy and grace, calls me to the feast of restoration, in great anticipation of fulfilling His purposes for me and through me.  

     At least that's where I am with it all right now.  More insights could be forthcoming...

     Do YOU have any thoughts?  I'd love to hear them.

   

Grace and Mercy, Mercy and Grace

Mercy pays my debt and brings my account back to zero.
Grace deposits above and beyond what I deserve.
Mercy is when the Father ran out to the Prodigal and embraced him, welcoming home the son.
Grace killed the fatted calf and brought the robe and ring, restoring him as an heir.